Wednesday, March 8

I Am Posh Spice. I Am The Law.

The Outrageous.

The world Posh Spice aka Victoria Beckham lives in is a relatively blessed and charmed one...her husband is an overated footballer...she was a member of a terrible 5-piece band who liked askin what we really want (i'd like you to stfu)...and the last few years (read: im bored at home makin babies) has seen her likin to be seen in fashion shows for no apparent reason...

Rubbin shoulders with the glamorous haute couture folks has an inter-dimensional power over Victoria...she nows claims to be able a reputable fashion nightmare icon...and is wise enough to draw up a
10 Commandments For Lookin Posh...

She says: Visualise your overall look.
What she really means: I need a stylist to decide what to wear.

She says: Borrow from the 1950s era.
What she really means: My grandmother's wedding dress looks cool.

She says: Shop globally preferably from Japan and New York.
What she really means: If Godzilla and King Kong can do it, so can i.

She says: Keep a baggy Stella McCartney jumper dress handy for bad days.
What she really means: Alexander McQueen laughed at my fake boobs.

She says: Get the right bags, shoes or sunglasses.
What she really means: I'm insecure.

She says: Invest in timeless classics.
What she really means: Casablanca is a favorite movie of mine.

She says: Customise by cutting the waistband off jeans. Or wearing
inside-out T-shirts.
What she really means: They go well with fake boobs.

She says: Dress from the inside out.
What she really means: I like lookin like Superman. Red underwear, cape and all.

She says: Trust in the opinions of few friends.
What she really means: I know im fat.

She says: Don't let it all hang out; it's much sexier to leave a little to the imagination.
What she really means: I wont forgive David for
sleeping with adrock2xander.

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