Wednesday, October 6
Thoughts
Im in agony about decisions i make bout my career and life...
Surprised? Well dont be...there's just a lot more bout adrock2xander than what you've thought you already knew...part of me really wants to surrender to (for lack of a better term) the will of God...do what the universe directs me to do and have faith that it is what im supposed to be doin...walk the spiritual path (ok that sounds lame...but it's true)...strive to become a better and better person...love people...
Part of me thinks i can love people and become a better person no matter what i do...find a mate here...settle down...find the best job that im proud of and just be content....hell sometimes i even think that i should settle here in backwater Singapore (for all my gripes bout this country...this really is where i grew up...my family and most of my friends are here...this country has bound me up with fond memories over the last 25 years)...however ive grown very tired of this country...her people and her government...for every hand the government extends out to us i look at it as another attempt to insult my very Caucasian-ised intelligence...there's only so much Asian values such as fillial piety...respect for elders and bullshit that i can tolerate...
Part of me thinks i should strive for a really "meaningful" career...ive always told myself to quit my job when im 30 or 35...and leave for Eastern Europe and teach English...it's the greatest opportunity for me to travel and see the world...my network and view of the world is so small...i'd like to broaden it...
I have the voice which says i should go deep into my advertisin career...strive to become an Account Director...but..im too much of a big picture person to be unable to see that while tinkering with the minds of regular Joe with my colorful ads is fun...much of MY message is ill conceived and poorly delivered coz all ads are delivered to maximise profits these days...and at the unfortunate expense of genuine creativity...
And...there's my education to pursue...but THAT...is one story that will be told soon enough...i promise...right now im still workin on the schemetics of that...
As for now...the path chosen for me by God is leadin the way...it is also the scariest and the riskiest...but it's a risk i've gota take...as the decisions i make in the next 3 months are most likely to bring me what i feel i really need (intimacy...romantic love...and an education *HINT HINT*)...but...maybe that risk carries with it the chance of grand reward beyond anything i can see...for that...i think it is worth sacrificin what i have now...
Im in agony about decisions i make bout my career and life...
Surprised? Well dont be...there's just a lot more bout adrock2xander than what you've thought you already knew...part of me really wants to surrender to (for lack of a better term) the will of God...do what the universe directs me to do and have faith that it is what im supposed to be doin...walk the spiritual path (ok that sounds lame...but it's true)...strive to become a better and better person...love people...
Part of me thinks i can love people and become a better person no matter what i do...find a mate here...settle down...find the best job that im proud of and just be content....hell sometimes i even think that i should settle here in backwater Singapore (for all my gripes bout this country...this really is where i grew up...my family and most of my friends are here...this country has bound me up with fond memories over the last 25 years)...however ive grown very tired of this country...her people and her government...for every hand the government extends out to us i look at it as another attempt to insult my very Caucasian-ised intelligence...there's only so much Asian values such as fillial piety...respect for elders and bullshit that i can tolerate...
Part of me thinks i should strive for a really "meaningful" career...ive always told myself to quit my job when im 30 or 35...and leave for Eastern Europe and teach English...it's the greatest opportunity for me to travel and see the world...my network and view of the world is so small...i'd like to broaden it...
I have the voice which says i should go deep into my advertisin career...strive to become an Account Director...but..im too much of a big picture person to be unable to see that while tinkering with the minds of regular Joe with my colorful ads is fun...much of MY message is ill conceived and poorly delivered coz all ads are delivered to maximise profits these days...and at the unfortunate expense of genuine creativity...
And...there's my education to pursue...but THAT...is one story that will be told soon enough...i promise...right now im still workin on the schemetics of that...
As for now...the path chosen for me by God is leadin the way...it is also the scariest and the riskiest...but it's a risk i've gota take...as the decisions i make in the next 3 months are most likely to bring me what i feel i really need (intimacy...romantic love...and an education *HINT HINT*)...but...maybe that risk carries with it the chance of grand reward beyond anything i can see...for that...i think it is worth sacrificin what i have now...
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