Tuesday, May 18

 
Of TV and ugly...

The premier of Nip/Tuck was a...typical of good US series that's mysteriously ignored by Singaporeans who prefer fucked up low budget sub-par English and Mandarin local dramas...low key affair...apart from a couple of fascinatin TV trailers on late prime-time...it was relegated to the sidelines as the final season of Friends took Singapore by storm...

I had the audacity to sit through a 45 minutes special of Friends...let's be frank...Friends is no longer funny..10 season of the same ol' same ol'...how da fuck can the writers keep the sophisticated audience amused? I'd stopped watchin Friends after season 5...and perhaps for old times' sakes...i plonked myself infront of the tube with my Nachos to see what i've missed out on...

Turns out to be nothin much or fresh...Joey is still stupid...Chandler is still tryin to be wise-crackin...Ross is still confused bout his sexuality...Rachel still sports that hairdo-that-was-once-the-rage-but-is-now-just-plain-passe...Monica still walks around without a bra (not that im complainin...and Phoebe's still as neurotic as ever...

I stirred from my couch when the theme song came on at the end of the show...i must have fallen asleep...what can i say...borin with a capital B...who da fuck cares if Ross's kissin a black chick? Or Monica has shells on her hair? Geme Nip/Tuck already...

And what a savin grace Nip/Tuck was! I was absolutely riveted to this new series...this drama is set in a Miami plastic surgery center...McNamara-Troy...with the plot revolvin around the 2 doctors/partners...Sean McNamara (Dylan Walsh) is having problems at home...tryin hard to ammend problems between him and his wife Julia (Joely Richardson). Sean's partner and good friend Christian Troy (Julian McMahon) is a sex-starved bloke who uses his "charm" to bring in potential female candidates while gettin himself involved in illicit money-makin deals. What makes this series a sure-fire watcher is the graphic depiction of surgeries the doctors perform and the twisted...and from the first episode...macabre plotlines...now you know a series is good when your Dad never flinches from the TV and even comments on it...the last time my Dad took a likin to my TV obsession was Alias...and look how far the Jennifer Garner vehiecle has gone..

Ive never been satisfied with my appearance...save for the inevitable abuse and bullyin i was subjected to back in Elementary throughout High School for my seemingly 'different ways'...the only peeve i have is my appearance. You see...my facial appearance is stuck in the middle of 'Caucosoid and Mongoloid'...i have beautiful natural double eyelids that make for eye-candy...full lips ripe for kissin...a sharp nose with a high bridge nose that can cut through steel like knife though butter...naturally lean physique that's of above-average Asian height...and a hairy chest (few Chinese have any hair to speak of on their chest)...life doesnt get any better does it?

Unfortunately no...im plagued by grotesquely ugly facial and body imperfections...my face is too broad...my eyes are somewhat small...i dont have the 'round dome' at the back of the head that most bald Caucasian men sport...i have strangely small hands...womenly-like to be told...and a burgeoning belly that sometimes betray my 33-inch waist...

Let's face it...im ugly...*sob*...in fact i think im uglier than this bloke pictured..there just isnt another solution to my diseased look...i think goin under a knife is the only solution...
Pretty Boy.

Now all i need is a philantropist who believes in my Hollywood Matinee good looks and donate a token sum into my trust fund...

Anyone?

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